"...Happy-Ness in Strife"

                                                                              Epilogue

          Dr. Ken Ring  and  Dr. Joseph  Campbell speak of "the terror filled pitfalls of the 'Inward Journey' ".    Thing about That ???    What {the fuk} is the Alternative ?!

          I've been reluctant [if not abjectly reticent] to offer the `Works` of Steve Winwood as Protective Armor against the Primal Savagery of Self Penetration {the so-called "terror-filled pitfalls"} yet I do so Now in my Effort to introduce the Curious to the 'Inward Journey' .  Of Great Import is Traffic's "John Barleycorn Must Die" as it contains Winwood's Descriptions of his Life's ------------------Explorations.  

          There is also Dr. William James' The Will To Believe which is Cerebral in both Form and Function but offers {Sword} Insights into Psychological Realities that 'cuts through' debilitative Emotionalism by examining Inner Fears and describing their Effect upon Waking Conscious.

Rock Steady........Steady az She goze....

          

          

          

S Sense

           'Self Penetration' is simply another way of `saying` "Seeing into one's Self [and the Attainment of Buddhahood".   Penetration implies Exertion as opposed to mere Contemplation, Reflection,, or even Circumspection--all of which `carry` a `sense` of {regional} passivity to their application.  'Drilling' supplies the proper address because of its physics---the turning of the bit and the cutting of material in the Effort to 'get to the bottom' where Essence lies.  This Essence is {of course} the Buddha-Nature itself, otherwise referred to as 'Enlightenment' the Attainment of which ENDS the Cycle of Birth-Death-and Rebirth, and which is glamorized as "Becoming ONE, Infinite Time, Infinite Space".   The so-called "Infinite Time, Infinite Space" is further {determined} by the term "Samsara" a `Psychological Realm' of Perfection where Perfection is a Mental Utopia where Suffering is NON-Existent and both Life and Death Exist and DO NOT Exist at the exact same time.  {"No Life and Death and also no Extinction of them."}

          

          

Seek and ye shall grind ...

           The Role of Martial Arts Instructors of ALL Disciplines is `To make the students BIGGER, SMARTER, FASTER and STRONGER`.   The Physical Attributes should not need any magnification, but 'Smarter' is "Cerebral" in that Self Defense is SUPPOSE-to-be Spiritual in Nature, and the Study of Martial Arts is >at the most Primal<, the Study of REALITY defined by Motion {as} Meditation.   Here it is where Self Penetration is not only Experienced Inwardly as `Accessing Universal Energy` but manifests Outwardly as Self Expression.   Self Penetration is simply 'boring into' the walls that `protect` Wisdom .  I believe it is safe to write, Wisdom 'leads to' Enlightenment,  here, Wisdom must be seen as Dharma [Truth].  One's Self is the Universal One of which the singular 'Self' is unified.  Oddly, ( and somewhat {aggravatingly} the Universe finds it Necessary to GUARD Wisdom so as to FORCE Seekers to Sacrifice and WORK to find It, DESPITE Wisdom's "All/Everywhere 'Force Posture' " .    It is far EZ-ER to Teach the Acquisition of Wisdom than to whip and lash the Basic Motions of Self Defense Physicality.   "SMARTER" is engagement of the Mind in the Effort to 'enhance' ConsciousNess that it may better ACCEPT Reality-as-The Ultimate.   

Shudder Failure

                                                                                  Prologue

          Thousands upon thousands of you folks haven't wondered `Exactly how does "No Thought No Mind" generate Text ?`.    Well, it's like a cement mixer.   The EmptyNess of the barrel (or bin) is partially filled by thoughts, experiences, readings and words and left to spin and mix until the batch is ready.  Once set in motion, the only thing required is a brief check, just to make certain that the unit remains 'plugged in' .

          So it is with Master Fortin's "Handbook For Kwan Um Do Kwang Instructors" .   I have evidenced various (and sundry) resources and set my "Im-Movable" in Motion, trusting the Physics and the Dharma to blend the Ingredients into USABLE Condition .   Most days, I don't even bother to check on it, such is the true nature of Trust.

          There's this {phuqqued-uP} that borders on Zen Master Yogi Berra Profundity, it is this, "When its ready, it'll be ready."  Shit like this makes Captain Obvious WINCE .   I shudder and twitch ..........

Berserkulosis

                                                                                    Epilogue

          I'm gonna leave this here, I gotta prepare the mowers for today's {practice} .   

          With the War ongoing it is disgustingly revulsive to think that being here and doing work is ANY form of misery or suffering.   When I get tired even with mental fatigue I ask myself, 
"Is anybody shooting at you ?  Are there explosions at your feet ? "  

          Truth is Relative ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rock Steady........steady az She goze....

          

TB or not TB

           [    ]......but Know this :    a 'Superiority Complex' is based upon abject INFERIORITY,  ask any Psychologist or Psychiatrist, they will concur.  Of this I suffer and I suffer greatly.

          I'm  in  my  71st  Orbit  Around  The Sun, I've  yet  to  find  the wherewithal  to pen the  Effects of Upbringing because in the so-called "Cozmic Scheme Of Things" I had a GOOD upbringing, the  one  that  a  Portuguese   Catholic  would  Praise  as  steadfastly  Wonderful.        [    ]....hardly that because my now bless-ed Inferiority DEMANDS I over-achieve by using the deepest and most profound GUILT  ---> the Guilt that only Parents can inflict.   [    ]....and so I struggle .

          There's this :  If I were ANYTHING then I'd be Something.  It's Mind Cancer I KNOW.

          I also know that Mind Cancer Can't be Cured, it's like TB, it can only be Arrested.

          

          

MONU-Mental

           It aint that I just wanna be known for being 'Mental'----------I wanna be MONU-Mental--- that's the 'running gag' in which I indulge.   I tried to find a something for 'mental patient', I got nothin'..... I could never be a doctor because I have no patience.   {i crap myself uP}.   My EGO Subsumes the Universe--shoveling a ton of loam, being ABLE to shovel a ton isn't enough---it isn't enough to Satisfy me----ANYONE can shovel a ton----now should I endure to NINETY  and shovel a ton THEN ---well THAT'd be Something----damn straight it would----------I look Forward to Dying from Over Exertion at least I'd Die with my Boots On  ---the so-called Working Man's Glory .   

          [    ] ....and beneath all that {stupor-ficial} is my Samurai Arrogance---the one that is INTENT upon PROVING that a Zen Swords'Man is capable of "Walking through walls" and ACTIVELY generating a Beauty that can Lighten Loads and imbue Visual KINDNESS and do so with the EASE of Mastery and Mechanics {Me CAN ics}.  [    ]....and all those years and years of seated Meditation affords me access to the Hidden Realms and Coveted Dimensions of Imagination, Wonder,  and  Vision thereby supplying me with seemingly ENDLESS Resolve to 'Enhance' Mother Nature with Human {Foundry}.   

         Believe me,,, I have Issues.

Summer Eeze

           The corn is uP, the lavender down and the cucumbers have their trellis.   I've planted corn so many times ago---never thinking the soil was weak---never believing that some Cozmic Force would deny generation----in thoze days I Believed in Nature's Goodness, Believed She would "always and everywhere" produce her Bounty with Ravishing Good Looks and lavishing Plenty, the food of the Gods, guaranteeing an Immortality resplendent with Divinity and Sacred Confirmation of Earth-while Holiness.

          ...and isn't It Glorious [[???]]  to  see Growth everyday, to measure the Summer Hundred, one day one inch at a time ???  ....to be INSIDE that Growth--- to see feel and HEAR Its strain toward Heaven, a Heaven only INCHES from the Earth---------the SOUND of Visual Growth----------- it almost hurts.

B U T {Beauty}

                                                                         Prologue

          The search for the "first sentence"~~~"days pass as days pass", the unrelenting guilt of promises broken, mind bent and twisted, the `call of the child` pleading for "life or death" Indulgence----abject dismissal of Duty toward one' self, and the Bitterness, always the Bitterness, of Misery gone the way of stained mind-fabric, the one of hooded cloak, the uniform of callous industry.   I find myself running away----- the self inflicted Plight of old men and weary Generals whose Valor and Honor fade with what little strength the Times of Yore  once heralded as Life Affirming and Future Assuring.  The Ancient moaned it best, "Gone, all gone".