Deploration

When I have a Sword in my hand, or a chainsaw, or almost ANY tool, I do NOT have to "prove" myself to ANYBODY >>  my work "Speaks" for itself << .  But place a pen, in this instance a keyboard and screen, and lo and behold Confidence evap----or-------a------t--------e----------  s  .
Put a Broad in front of me and I'm fucked <>  and NOT in the Good Way.
My X once ended, "I love you but I can't TAKE you 24 7."   Crissy Hind and her Pretenders do a mob hit that riots, "Your demands were unending."  So it was..... I understood her.   All I wanted was EVERYTHING.  I can cackle at that, even sneer.

I THINK that's why I'm writing tonite---to defend myself AGAINST my own Insanity, my own Mental Illness, my own Social Autism, my own Bi-Polarism, my own Blindingly Selfish-Icity, you know the one, the one whose Arrogance cloaks unrelenting Inferiority and not the GOOD Kind, the one of Humility >>> ^ <<<  But the one of inexorable Deploration  (deplorable-ness), the one that causes me to manifest [on the street] with "menacing intensity". 

That's why I try to stay off the Streets, stay AWAY from Innocents.

Were I rich I'd be a reclusive Eccentric, thing is I'm NOT rich, the exact OPPOSITE actually >> so all THAT makes me is fucked-uP.